I'm back...

It's coffee time:-) Cheers!

• Here I am. Emotionally exhausted and morally bankrupt. Back after a break that lasted longer than I expected. But it was much needed. I've cleaned up my social media. I've deactivated my personal as well as my Poonapalooza page on Facebook. It was very time consuming trying to keep up with blogging, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and 2 Facebook accounts. So it's just gonna be blogging, Twitter and Instagram from now on. The only downside of this is that there were people who reached my blog through my links on Facebook. But mostly family members and friends. Now we may have to actually talk on the phone to find out what's going on in our lives.
• So what's up? Well I've had a few setbacks over the past 6 weeks. Physical as well as personal. Let's start with mid-December first shall we? I ended up falling on an early morning run right after publishing my blogging break post. I fell on all fours and banged my knees and palms up real good. I did take one day off of running, but the way I was affected most was that I was unable to do yoga for about 3 weeks. We spend a lot of time on our hands and knees, so I had to take a Yoga break. I'm back now and have been for about 3 weeks so it's all good, but it really did suck for my relaxation while I couldn't do yoga. 
• Christmas was hectic. As always I left everything to the last minute. The best thing about the holidays though? I didn't have to cook for a change. Christmas Day was with my in-laws and Boxing Day was with my family. For the first time ever, I worked on Christmas Eve. It wasn't so bad though. The office was a ghost town and I got all my wrapping done.
• On Boxing Day I ran my first race since the Stockholm Halv. The Boxing Day 10 Miler. It's a Hamilton tradition. Ninety-four years old. I'll likely not run it again. I got last year's medal because they ran out and there was no food at the finish line except for a banana and water. Ten miles is 16K. We should have gotten more food than that. And I paid $55 to run that race. I expected a lot more than an old medal and a banana. I didn't do too badly over all. Ran a 6:55/km pace. I'll take it. I'm still struggling with my pace and runs. 

Boxing Day 10 Miler.

• New Year's Eve was quiet at my house. We stayed home and watched a movie. Hubby and I usually do that ourselves every year after Julien has gone to bed. But Julien wanted to stay up till midnight, so we let him. He did better than me. I wanted to pack it in by 11pm. I was also sick with a head cold, but it was a nice quiet family night.
• New Year's Day brought sadness to my family. My cousin died in a fire early that morning. His house was completely engulfed in flames and he was found in the basement the next day. Such a shocking start to the New Year. There are lots of legal repercussions from his death because he had no will. He was the Power of Attorney for my elderly aunt who lives in a home and suffers from Alzheimer's. He was her only child and her husband passed away about 7 years ago so the responsibility for her estate and health is left to her next of kin. That's my dad. He cannot take on that responsibility as he needs his own finances managed. There's just a lot of red tape to sort through as we figure out who and how to appoint new Powers of Attorney for my aunt.
• I am currently training for the Chilly Half Marathon (1st weekend in March) and the Around the Bay 30K (last Sunday in March). My training has me doing yoga 3x per week and Pilates once per week along with my scheduled 5 runs per week. Temps have been bitter some days, and very manageable others. Either way I have to run. And I have to eat more as my mileage increases. I haven't been weighing myself (again), but I have gotten leaner. I can feel it in my clothes. Yoga and Pilates has also started to firm me up. Especially in my shoulders, obliques and legs. 
• Work has been heartbreaking and anxiety ridden over the past week. Something major happened on one of my cases and it has just about broken me. My training schedule took a hit this week, but I'm back on track again. I need the normalcy of that right now. And I need to remember to eat and drink lots of water. I hate the feeling of helplessness when you know something horrible is going to happen but you can do nothing to stop it. But I must keep powering on. I've my son to think of. I've been emotionally unavailable over the past week and I know he can feel the change in me. That's not okay. But sometimes I wish I could just have a major breakdown and be a huge mess. That's not gonna happen because I can't afford to do that. I'm not gonna lie. I did have a glass of wine last night even though I said I wasn't going to drink till after The Bay. I'm not going to feel bad about it either.
• I've been on a therapy hiatus. My therapist needed an extended break. She's been back for a while and I've been dragging my heels at making an appointment. I'm calling Monday to get back into regular sessions. I need it after the incident at work and I'm still working on my self-esteem issues. That struggle is still very real. And I'll likely always have issues in that area of my life. 
• So that's me in a nutshell. I'm not sure how often I'm going to blog. I'm taking one week at a time right now. Lots of crazy going on in my head. If you feel so inclined you can follow me on Twitter or Instagram. I follow back and post regularly, albeit mostly inappropriately. Twitter is my outlet. It's fun for me so don't get your knickers in a knot if I seem different on there than I do here. This is my real life, Twitter is the convoluted me. And it's not real. I don't always make sense and I'm much less filtered. You've been warned! Follow buttons to the right of me, jokers to the left.

Cuddles with my beautiful boy:-)