Thursday, May 8, 2014

The post about a hectic and nerve wracking week

My Saturday...Was homeless all afternoon due to house showings. Started out in a bar, went to a shed raising where I was the project manager. Resisted the salt and vinegar chips. I may have had too much wine to drink...

Sunday's run. Broke my running shades. I've had them since the beginning:-( I crazy glued them back together and got my finger's glued together in the process. Accidently turned my running app off at the top of the mountain.

  • I have been neglecting this blog BIG time. And everyone else's blog for that matter. And my correspondence. I have a dozen messages waiting for reply in my in-box. I promise, I will get to them real soon. I answer every email I get. Just bear with me please. This time, right now, is hands down is one of the most stressful times in my life. My house has not been sold yet, and even though I know it will sell, I can't handle the pressure of owning two properties at once. Lots of interest, but no written offers. I live in a century home. My basement is dark and damp and is solely used for storing Christmas decorations and my cat's litter boxes. I never go down there. Apparently it's putting people off. I have been here for 8 years. It has never flooded and looks no different than it did when I moved in. My 2 foot thick stone foundation walls have not eroded! I have two return viewers today who are very interested. Fingers and toes crossed...I need to get this done!
  • Between the house, family, clients and tight deadlines at work, I feel like I'm being pulled in many different directions right now. I need a big ugly cry, but don't even have the energy to get that done. My sleeping is completely off. I'm waking at 3:30 am every morning, and not able to fall back asleep because my stomach is in turmoil.
  • Even my running has been off. I'm struggling with my runs. Not sure what that is all about. Lack of focus, nothing to train for? I'm confused. But I'm still running so that's the important thing. I really need to join the gym and add something else to my routine, but I am sorely lacking in funds and time right now. The next few months are going to be crazy. I'll be moving house. I just want everything to be done. 
  • I'm not eating great. I go all day without eating because my stomach is full of anxiety. Then I eat whatever my husband makes for dinner. I'm not eating off plan, but I should be eating more throughout the day though. And I'm eating more nuts than I should at night. The majority of my food intake happens at night. I'm not eating enough and perhaps that is why I'm struggling with my runs? Not eating enough and drinking too much coffee. Hmmmmm.
  • A short post with a lot of pictures to let you all know that I am ok. I'm just busy and stressed. I'm still alive and kicking and I know that all this stress shall pass. On a real positive note, I haven't been taking the Adivan at all. I am using the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction therapy and keeping myself calm. I am learning to control what would have been full fledged panic attacks. That is good no?
  • Thanks for all the support and lovely messages. They really brighten my day:-) Fingers crossed I sell my house this weekend so that I can get back to my regular routines! I hate lacking focus and whining and moaning:-( xxx

Spring weather has me feeling better about myself. I am feeling worn down though. I'm not gonna lie, I've filtered the shit out of these photos! Heavy bags under my eyes is my new look. No idea why my lips are white in the bottom left pic...

Stuff I ate at work yesterday. Dragon fruit (tastes ok, like kiwi but not much flavor) and baby bananas are adorable. I ate waaaay too many of those Cashews. Salt and vinegar chips were one of my binge foods. Those were dangerous to be around. Sat through training all afternoon and nodded off several times. That's what happens when you've been up since 3:30am.