Friday, February 28, 2014

The post about many thanks, therapy and Pandora's box

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Some words of wisdom.

  • I am speechless. I don't even know where to start except to say, thank you all for your lovely comments, emails, Facebook messages, Tweets, Instagram comments. I am truly overwhelmed by your outpouring of support. As much as I'd like to thank you each individually, I am too emotional to do that. But please know that there is nothing more helpful for me right now than to know that so many people care about me. I appreciate you all.
  • I have thought long and hard about my upcoming therapy. Although I'm not going to share anything deeply personal, I am going to be sharing my experiences in therapy with you. If it can help someone else, it's worth it. My first session is March 5th. 
  • When I was obese, I used to think that my life would be perfect if I could lose weight. How very incorrect that statement is. I will admit, my life is better. I can do lots of things I never dreamed of doing when I was overweight.  But mentally, it's not so cut and dry. I always heard about self  image issues after weight loss, I just never imagined they would be so debilitating. 
  • I had a great talk with my supervisor on Thursday morning. He was so awesome and so supportive. Not only is my depression affecting my family, but it's also affecting my clients. I know that I am not as driven at my job right now as I normally am, and that's not okay. My clients depend on me. That was another reason why I knew I had to take action and work on healing. People count on me.
  • I'm not gonna lie. I am scared. Therapy is going to open Pandora's box. There is a lot of issues from my past that I have never dealt with. I know it will be cleansing and freeing in the end, but getting to that point will be hard. 
  • I'm keeping this post short. I am emotionally drained. This week has been harrowing to say the least. But I  feel more hopeful now than I have in a long time. I've been down this road before and I know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Just knowing that I have taken the first few steps on my journey to get there has already lightened the heaviness of my heart a tiny bit. That's still moving forward, right? Have a great weekend:)